blogakuyangpunya

2010-08-25T11:26:00.000-07:00

aku xmerancang semua ini terjadi,

semua ini telah ditentukan,

keperitan itu mengajar aku,

mengajar aku untuk berfikir.

ketabahan pada diriku sedang diuji,

aku aku mengenal diri ini,

dan kini aku semakin mengenal diriku,

takdir yang telahku temui.

apa yang ku cari,

dan apa yg aku dapat,

itulah takdirku...

2010-08-21T13:03:00.000-07:00

dikala kesepian itu kian hilang,

aku biarkan persaan itu kembali,

tapi..ku biarkan juga kesepian itu hilang,

aku semakin putus asa dengan keaadan ini.

ketika ia menghampiri,

ku biarkan tanpa kata,

tanpa ku sadari,

perasaan itu masih ada.

aku tak mampu lagi berlari,

berlari bersama perasaan ini,

kerana perasaan ini,

akan bersama harapan.

masa mmg selalu bersama kehidupan

2010-02-20T10:11:00.000-08:00

masa yang mengajar aku kehidupan,
tanpa masa aku xkan penah knl khidupan,
malam aku terasa semakin kelam,
disana aku temui siang iaitu masa.

kerna itu aku cuba mengenal masa,
masa sering bersama kehidupan,
sembilu dalam kehidupan mmg intim,
kerna sembilu itulah kehidupan.

2010-02-20T07:26:00.000-08:00

gile geli r beb..lama nye aku x update blog aku ni....mmg da mcm umah antu la plak ditinggakan lelamaaa....gagagagaga...biasa r,dah berkerja ni mcm xde idea plak nk tulis pape..siput betul...xleh nk layan perasaan ckit...

kali ni aku nk citer kat korang pasal LI aku kat PUSAT MEMPROSES MAKANAN FAMA...kat batu pahat,johor...eerrmm..mende aku ni cite ek...

seronok gile aku LI kat sini..pasal ape??ramai pompuan lak plak..gagagaga..korang tengok gambar 2 pow da cukup..2 baru separuh 2..hahaha...ada 12 pompuan..2 orang je laki..gugugu..mereka semua kebyakan nye amik kos teknologi makanan..sampai aku chemical eng..mmg lari r..x pasal2...tengok aku nye keje pown mcm xde kene mengena..hahahaha..wat promotion..tp xpe...ilmu 2 mcm2..aku blaja bisnes kali nih..sape tau aku le jadi bisnesman nanti..jual tempe pown jadi r...hahaha..

conclusion yg aku dpt wat selama aku wat LI kat FAMA nih...aku dapat mengenal dunia bisnes yg lebih besar lagi dari ape yg aku wat kat UMP...softskill aku dapat aplikasikan..gagaga..kasih sayang..kasih sayang?????apekah???hahahaha...how to treat people in work place..mcm2 lagi la..(sebenarnye xtau nk tulis pe pown..hentam saja laahhhh)..

malas aku nk tulis panjang2..mengarut je lebih..gagagaga...

cchooowwwww...

LUKISAN ITU

2009-12-18T01:23:00.000-08:00

Dari jauh aku dapat lihat,
ianya sebuah lukisan,
dia hanya diam pada kedudukannya,
walhal ada cerita yang ingin disampaikan.

sedihnya tak semua yg memahami,
Sang pelukis begitu menhayati,
Setiap calitan pada lukisannya,

tapi hampa ada yg kurang mengerti,
hanya org sepertinya yg akan menghargai.

Impian & Harapan

2009-12-09T02:43:00.000-08:00

patut ke aku meninggalkan segala ape yg aku inginkan selama ni?
aku menjadi semakin bingung,
jiwa yg telah dianugerahkan oleh tuhan,
semakin aku mencari,
semakin aku rasa payah,
faktor persekitaran yg menghalang segala impian,
aku bukan mahu berputus asa,
tapi menaruh harapan yg tinggi,
jiwa semakin memberontak entah siapa yg tahu,
keadaan sekeliling seakan-akan suka membiarkan jiwa aku disekat,
salahkah aku?

menjadi sebegini membuatkan aku xtau mana nk luahkan,
teman yang memahami xlagi aku jumpe,
aku dah hilang semangat,
jiwa semakin disekat,
sedangkan aku tau,
jiwa ini xkan hilang sampai bila-bila,
mana aku nk cari semangat itu,
tolong tunjuk aku semangat itu Ya ALLAH.

KERJA GILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-11-26T02:22:00.000-08:00

hahahahaha...
mmg gile sial...
nak tau nape??
semalam..
26.11.2009 hari rabu....
aku merentas 4 negeri dlam masa 7jam...
naik moto beb!!!!
1)pahang
2)negeri 9
3)melaka
4)johor

hahahahaha
kisah nye mcm nih...aku nak balik johor...patut nye 2 negeri je aku merentas...haha..pahang ngan johor je...pas 2 member aku nih moto beliau xde roadtax....hekeleh..die ajak aku lalu ikut keratong...mmg kene lalu n9 la..aku xtau jln 2...aku follow je r...katenye jauh skit je...hahaha..dah r nk mlm time 2...gerak je r...jln punya felda je ade...xde lampu dowh..moto aku ade r lampu...
dengan sesat nye....mmg cari nahas...hahaha...mcm2 dugaan r...ujan pown ade membantu melambatkan pejalanan...sian...ingat aku 2 kali member aku nk eksiden..1st skali kat jln batu2..boleh lak die x nampak batu2 2...hahaha..2nd die nk langgar kucing la plak...hahaha..mmg nk tergelak r aku...buleh lak x nampak...aku dari jauh da nmpak kucing nk melintas...wahahaha...podah!!!!
aku gak yg terer...hahaha...
sampai je sepadan johor..bersyukur aku...berjaya beb!!!!lalu kat felda x hapa-hapa ntah...ngan xde orng nye...xde lampu...mcm2 r takde...mlm lak 2..
kul 9 lebih aku sampi tangkak...lepak mkn...pas gerak...kul sebelas mlm aku sampai umah..mmg gile!!!!xpenah aku wat keje gile nih...
hahaha...
kesimpulannye jgn la wat keje gile time2 da abis sem nih...hahaha..

2009-11-22T20:27:00.000-08:00

dulu aku penah berkata,

satu cukup tuk semuanya,

tapi kini aku semakin kehadapan,

mencari segala yang samar.

dulu aku penah hilang yang satu itu,

kini sekali lagi aku merasa,

bukan takut untuk aku berhadapan,

tapi kerana aku xtau apa lagi yg akan hilang.

sekarang....

aku sedang menanti,

menanti mlam tuk berganti siang,

agar siang dapat memberiku semangat.

LEPAS SUDAH MINGGU2 EXAM...HUAHUA..

2009-11-20T05:09:00.000-08:00

(ni la kak hana yg slalu teman aku study)

(sempat lagi amik gambar beb!!)

lega pulak aku lepas exam ni..maut jugak sem nih!!aku berjaya merempuh 6 paper...

hahaha...tiba2 aku rajin plak sem nih belajar kat libr

ary beb!!!aku mcm xpercaya!!!xpernah aku buat t

uk sem2 lepas..ade la jugak skit2..

aku slalu study ngan kak hana,kak su and kak tia...tp x sempat nk bergambar sesama..huhu..

aku da last sem ni..semoga kite jumpe lagi..kalau ade rezeki...

seronok kenal ngan akak2 semua..aku suke..

semoga ini jadi memory kite sampai bila2..

terima kasih akakku semua!!!

huhuhu..

Dua Tahun Lima Bulan

2009-10-31T13:24:00.000-07:00

adakalanya kita hampir ke situ,

sahingga kita hilang rasa kesal,
mungkin aku terlalu merasa,
hingga hati aku enggan menerima.

perginya hari,
hilang..
hilang bersama lakaran,
yang selama ini sabati sudah.

indahnya yang lepas,
sehingga menindas yang perit,
tapi haluan yang bercabang,
menutup segala yang dulu.

Jom bergembira selagi masa masih ada!!!!

2009-10-31T12:14:00.000-07:00

1 2 3 lompat!!!!!
aiiiyaahhhhh!!!!
menarik!!!!!
gambar2 camni la akan menjadikan kenangan sampai bila2...
seronok gile weh...haha..

tolong aku...aku sakit skng ni..

2009-10-26T09:05:00.001-07:00

oooppppppsss....
jgn salh faham lak rakan2ku...hehehe...
aku tak sakit ape2 pown....perkataan "sakit" 2 sebnrnyer kerinduan n berat ati nk tinggalkan UMP tercinta ni..sem depan da nk LI lak...
aku mcm x sanggup je nk tinggal kan tempat ni..
walaupun tempatnye xde la menarik sngt..
tp kenangn aku kat sini terlampau byk..

aku akan tinggl kan rakan2 aku kat sini mungkin tuk sementara ataupon selamanya..
aku pown x pasti...
xde ape yg aku leh tinggal kan sini kecuali rakan2 dan kenangan...
semakin jauh aku pergi semakin aku akan mengerti hakikat kehidupan...
aku xkan penah lupe kawan2 yg mengenali aku kat sini...
bg aku kawan adelah lebih berharga dari wang ringgit,harta,emas,perak...ape lagi..

mcm biasa...aku time2 nih..aku temenung sengsorang...kenang kan ape yg da lalui..
aku lebih suke diam diri...
kadang2 org nmpak aku tido...tp sebenarnyer aku x tido....aku pikir ape yg aku nk pikir..kawan2,kenangan,rancangan masa depan...pas 2 last2 tido...kadang2 terlampau pikir sangt aku nangis sengsorang..bukan ade orang tau pown..nampak je rockers, tp ati sensetif beb!!!

kawn2 buat aku sngt2 bahagia..
aku x kisah aku kawan ngan sape pown...kawn wat idup aku eppy...
aku bahagia jadi diri aku..
aku x penah nyesal jadi diri..
apa ALLAH bg pada diri aku..aku sngt menerima..

last word "kebahagian aku ada pada korang semua"

Aku & Kenangan

2009-10-23T12:29:00.001-07:00

masa mmg tak penah menunggu sesiapa,
pergi membawa segala kenangan,
kenangan aku,
aku dan mereka,
perasaan aku,
biarlah aku seorang saja tahu,
hati aku semakin sensitif terhadap sesuatu.

segala rasa aku,
amat dalam,
aku sendiri tak dapat meluahkannya,
sedangkan aku sendiri tidak pasti,
apakah perasaan ini,
perasaan yang tak dapat diungkapkan.

aku setuju dengan falsafah "berkawan biar seribu",
akhirnya aku sendiri temui disebalik dari ayat itu.

SymBion 09 da best....

2009-10-21T06:54:00.000-07:00

alhamdulillah setelah setaun kami semua berkerjasama tuk menjayakan program SymBion nih, aku dapat rasa keseronokan yang x terhingga..aku dapat belajar sesuatu yang berharga..aku dapat rakan2 yang aku da anggap mcm adik beradik aku sendiri...dalam keluarga nih aku rasa aku mempunyai abang,akak,adik,rakan sebaya aku...aku dapat rasa kan kasih sayang yang x penah aku rasa..mungkin sebab aku xde akak n abg..memang perasan ni memg x penah aku rasakan...tiada penyesalan yg aku rasa..

segala galeri..segala memori..segala kenangan akan aku simpan sampai bila2...ingatan aku pada korang mmg x kan pudar...aku dapat rasakan mmg tuhan sengaja menemukan kita semua...pertemuan melahirkan rantai perhubungan yang akan berpanjangan...mmg setiap permulaan akan menemui akhirnya...tapi hati aku mmg tetap pada korang....aku sayang korang semua..

sem depan aku da nk LI....mungkin ini pertemuan kita yang terakhir...mmg pertemuan kita hanya seketika...tapi aku rasa mcm da bertahun2 kenal korang...kalu boleh sampai bila2 aku nk bersama korang...tapi kite mempunyai haluan msing2..hidup kita perlukan pengorbanan...semoga pengorbanan kita semua akan menemui kejayaan...pengorbanan berpisah dengan korang adelah pengorbanan yg besar bg aku...bg aku persahabatan kita semua adelah perkara yang terindah bagi aku...aku mmg seorang yg menghargai persahabatan aku..semoga korang pown x lupe aku...

aku akan teruskan hidup aku...terus mencari sahabat2 yang boleh mengurangkan ckit kerinduan aku pada korang nanti...tp aku tau mmg xkan ilang kerinduan 2...aku akan terus hidup aku tuk mencapai cita2 aku yang jauh haluannya dari bidang aku amik nih...

aku xkan lupe untuk mendoakan kejayaan korang semua..harap korang juga mendoakan kejayaan aku..korang membuat aku rasa sempurna..sempurna dalam hidup aku...mmg terasa indah..aku bersyukur sngt jumpa korang semua...

THANZZZZ TO U ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LOVE U!!!!!

dedikasi aku...

to amin : trima kasih r..aku byk mende belajar dari ko dengan hanya melihat cara ko jadi leader..
to farah : ko mmg sempoi r....aku suke kawan ngan ko...hahaha..
to kak wani : respect r kak wani...die mmg yg seorang berkerja keras..
to kak hana : kak hana pown sempoi...mkn lebih ckit..kasi gemok balik..haha..
to yuni : yuni,ko jgn kelam kabut sangat..relex..ko bertenang je..
to kak yan : sian tengok akak nih...kerja kuat sgt..sampai sakit2..relex2 kak..sakit kang sape susah
to teh : g jaga kilang tek BOH ko kat cameron sana...kang bankrup kang...hahaha..
to aida : hidup orng johor!!!haha..ada masa datng r umh aku...haha..
to kak tika : jgn tension2 kak..aku plak yg tension tengok ko kang..haha..

(sory bagi yang x tersenarai..da letih menaip)

akhir kata:
AKU SAYANG KORANG SEMUA!!!!!!

Top guitaries in malaysia

2009-10-16T10:35:00.000-07:00

kali ini aku nak korang tau yang aku teringin sngat nk jumpa permain2 gitar kat malaysia nih yang aku rasa sngat hebat...sebelum 2 aku nk korang hendaklah berfikiran terbuka..hahaha..boleh ke??mesti bulehnye...

aku pown rasa serba salah nk posting mende nih...nk tau kenapa??hahaha..
selalunya orang akan kate gini :

"ape bende lah yang ko minat sgt ngan mende ni" "mcm bagus je..." "ceh..buang duit je..baik ko g sedekah"

tp selepas difikir2kan..aku post je la..
sebab...kite mesti respect other interest...

guitarist pertama...
MAN KIDAL
bagi aku MAN KIDAL adelah legend di mlysia..sntuhn kidal adlh sntuhan yg sngat tpat...klebihn pd beliau adelah clean picking...mmg gempak r!!!!ingat senang nak main secara clean sound die...aku ingat 5,6 taun nk kene training..
secara tulusnya bagi aku sentuhan kidal mempunyai SOUL yang agak mendalam..die cukup mengkagumi RUDY KRISTAl kerana rudy mencapai tahap yg agak mngkagumkan pd usia yg muda..

guitarist kedua
EDRIE HASHIM

edrie hashim adelah seorang guitarist yang serba boleh...
byk backup artist2 yang cukup hebat..contoh..amy search,search,awie,cromok..die muda lagi..umur lebih kurang 30an...seorang pengarah muzik muda di malaysia...bermain gitar sejak wujudnya kumpulan search...dia tekad untuk bermain muzik dengan bersungguh2 sejak hillary ang keluar dari band search untuk belajar lagi gitar diluar negara...die mengikut jejak hillary belajar muzik kat mana ntah aku da lupe..

guitarist ketiga
RUDY KRISTAL
rudy kristal adelah guitarist yang muda dan hebat...sekarang beliau sedang on da way bergelar sebagai pengarah muzik..ingat senang ke beb nk dapt gelarn 2...pehhhh!!!!!kebanyak lagu2 yang dia ubah memang menarik...dasyat...hanya orng2 yang paham je yang akan kate dasyat..orng yang x paham baik ko diam je..haha..

guitarist ke-4
HILLARY ANG

Hillary ang adelag guitarist asal search...keluar dari search sebab nk sambung belajar gitar...lepas 2 die join cromok..lepas karl cromok da xde...hillary juga antara legend guitarist kat malaysia nih walaupun die ni cina...

itu lah sedikit sebyk antara guitarist yang aku minat kat malaysia nih...lepas nih aku akan cerita tentang guitarist kat luar negara lak...sebab aku ngah otw research tentang legend2 yang lain..

PUTERI GUNUNG LEDANG

2009-10-13T12:11:00.001-07:00

setapak melangkah,
dua langkah ingatan kanda pada dinda,

adinda bersumpah,
jikalau kekanda tidak kembali,
adinda akan menyusul kekanda,
memijak pada tanah yang sama,
bernafas pada udara yang sama.

layar berbelok-belok,
sawah dibongkar ditempat tenang,
yang tinggal hati tak elok,
yang pergi hati tak senang,
bila sampai waktu,
kita akan bersama.

(petikan dari filem puteri gunung ledang)

Sengal tang Otak...

2009-10-12T12:16:00.000-07:00

ade pape pown aku nk tunjukkan..cuma hadiah berupa hamper...mcm bangang je muke aku...wahahahahahahahaha...gelak r ape lagi!!!!!!!

trip to cameron highland!!!!

2009-10-08T12:42:00.000-07:00

pehhh...dasyat oooo...1st time aku sampai cameron...rasa mcm jakun la plak aku..hahaha...
sebenarnye trip ni adelah project yang aku n da geng kene settlekan...biasa la tiap2 sem mesti ade je projek2 tuk subjek tertentu..kali ni aku amik subjek FOOD ENGINEERING!!!!...

trip kali ni kitorang gerak pada ari kamis petang sehingga hari sabtu mlm...byak tempat yg dituju..high5,upm(faculty of food ape ntah aku pown lupe),teh BOH,MARDI,ladang starwbery...

(aku kat ladang teh BOH)

first skali thanz to prof Nordin yg sudi menyediakan hotel penginapan free(Umah die kat kajang) selama 2 ari..hahaha...free 2!!!mana nk dapat!!!!...pergerakan kami ke cameron pada ari jumat mlm..kitorang x bermalam di kat cameron pagi pegi petang balik...

agak menarik trip kali ni dan laen2 daripada yg lain...hehehe..nk tau nape??1st skali xde pompuan yg involve,2nd kitorang semua laki 12 orang je yg amik subjek ni...hahaha..

nak tau pe kelebihan nye??
mesti la senang nak handle pape pown..sebab semua laki kan...
kos pown kurang...aku spend duit x sampai 50inggit...2 pown mkn gile2 punya..hahahah..seronuk2...

gambar kat sebelah ni pulak aku kedai strawbery ntah ape nama kedai 2 aku pown x ingat....huahua...
agak best la g tempat 2...

(gambar kat atas ni lak kitorang kat teh BOH berlatar belakangkan ladang teh boh)

(mlm sebelum gerak g cameron kitorang rewang dulu wat BBQ)

(ini lah hasilnye BBQ...kitorang mkn ngan nasi goreng..tp aku da letih nk upload gambar lagi)

PERTEMUAN

2009-10-08T12:20:00.000-07:00

jika engkau imbas kembali,
pada waktu itu,
hanya selangkah engkau bergerak,

pada waktu itu,
tiada apa dunia bagimu,
tiada yang indah selain hayalan.

cuba engkau berdiam diri,
cuma seketika,
penyusulanmu begitu jauh.

aku...
hanya mampu berbicara sendiri,
kerana pertemuan begitu jauh.

Raya kali ke 20 bagi ku..wahaha..

2009-09-29T16:36:00.000-07:00

(gambar diatas:aku bersama atok n mak aku aku dan juga pakcik n makcik aku)

tahun ni aku sambut raya ke-20....hehehe..betul ke??
ape pasal aku rasa lain je raya kali nih???
mcm ade perubahan besar je...hahaha...
dah r wet raya kurang!!!!!
xsampai pown 50inggit...tension!!!!...
hahaha....30 inggit pown x sampai...apacer!!!!....

situasi pertama!!!!
masa ari raya ke-3 aku pergi la umh atok aku kat muar ngan mak aku...aku nk amik moto...pakcik aku guna nk wat g raya...aku sampai je terus masuk umh atok aku...time ade lak pak long aku...cam biasa salam2 r...ari raya r kan(mcm ari raya je salam orng..hahaha)

aku : assalamulaikum
pak long : ehh!!!(ngan nada yg terkezut) sape ni???sapik ke??
aku : hehehehe..ye r kowt...

situasi kedua!!!!
aku baru sampai umah amik moto kat umah atok aku....tp time 2 makcik ngan pakcik aku ngan anak2 die ngah raya kat umh..aku pown masuk umah ngan langkah yg penuh ari raya..wahaha..

aku :assalamulaikum
makcik aku:eh..sape ni?sapik ke?
aku :hehehehe(dlm ati aku:pulak dah x kenal aku plak,kene lagi...parah gini..)
pakcik aku :sapik r ni...biasa r dia...dah rockers skng..hahaha...
aku :yeke..hahaha...(layan jela..aku x amik ati pown..huhu)

Malay lit under threat

2009-09-09T16:00:00.000-07:00

National Laureate Abdul Samad Muhammad Said, better known as A. Samad Said, has 65 books to his credit, from short stories to poetry. His popular novels include Salina, Hujan Pagi, Cinta Fansuri and Langit Petang. The state of serious Malay literature in the country, however, makes the writer sad, angry, and frustrated. He tells Bissme S. he has given up all hope of it getting the recognition and support it deserves.

What is the biggest challenge you face as a Sasterawan Negara (National Laureate)?

To get real recognition, to have all your work accepted, especially in school. As a writer, you usually want your books to be accessible to students, who will be your audience in the future.

There was recently a news report that two years from now, books by national laureates would not be included in the school curriculum. What is your opinion on this matter?

Some clever guys in the Education Ministry have said Sasterawan Negara books shouldn’t be included in school because they are difficult. During my school days, we studied William Shakespeare, George Bernard Shaw, John Buchan’s The 39 Steps and Lord Byron. They were hard. But we had good teachers as intermediaries ... to help us understand the text. When you are 18 or 19, you already know these famous literature figures.

So you don’t agree with the move?

I think what they are doing is insulting. Usman Awang, Keris Mas and Shanon Ahmad have been writing for almost 50 years.

You cannot just say all the work of Sasterawan Negara are difficult. There are bound to be one or two books that are suitable.

You can say my poem Al-Amin is very difficult. But I have another poem Kita Ini Tetamu Singgah, which has been made a song. That poem is easy.

You must have teachers to help you understand the text, so you have some knowledge of good literature.

When Anwar Ibrahim was the Education Minister, and then when he was Finance Minister, he took care of this. He respected literature. He remembered writers. He even sent me books ... good books ... to read. He would invite Sasterawan Negara to read poems and their work for his office functions. This is rarely done now.

He even invited W.S. Rendra from Indonesia to read poems for his functions. He encouraged reading.

Even in Tun (Dr) Mahathir (Mohamad)’s time, he sent me books. He wrote "Samad, you should read this." They (Mahathir and Anwar) created situations where you love literature, where you loved writers.

Do you think these situations no longer exist?

Yes. It is very clear from what they are doing.

Some people say you’re angry because you’ll get less in royalties when your books are not used in schools.

I am 72 now. I don’t need a lot to survive on. I just need a small amount of money. I don’t even have a car. So I don’t have to worry about petrol and road tax. It is not about royalties. I don’t mind that they don’t want to use my books.

So you believe fewer youth will develop the reading habit as a result of the move?

Yes. With the help of the Education Ministry, this will happen. Just think of these students two decades from now. They are not exposed to good literature.

If you start saying the work of Sasterawan Negara are difficult at school level, then don’t expect them to touch these books when they leave school. You are sending out a clear message - do not read the work of Sasterawan Negara. Everything should start in school. We are not creating a situation where people will read good literature.

In America the students are studying To Kill A Mocking Bird, and in England they go for Lord Of The Flies. All are difficult books. If you want simple books, then just read ABC all the time.

Are you sad at the situation?

I used to be. But not anymore. I am angry now. They should be respecting Sasterawan Negara. But they are not.

What is your hope for serious Malay literature? What changes would you like to see the government make?

I don’t want to visualise anything anymore. I have no more hope. I will leave the situation the way it is. There is a small group of people in the ministry who are so clever, let them go on being clever. If they want it like that, let it be. I want to make them happy.

It appears that you have given up?

Yes. I have given up. I am sick of it. I don’t care any more. I am defeated.

What is your view of Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka (DBP)?

They have no tongue. (Writers association) Gapena (Gabungan Penulis Nasional) has no tongue now. They have not shown any reaction to this school situation. Their silence shows that they agree with what the ministry is doing.

The last time we spoke, you said you were trying to get from DBP the copyright for your books so you can publish your own books. Did you succeed?

Not all. They have given me the rights to 12 books, but not to seven others ... the most important ones ... the ones I want.

DBP always says the work of Sasterawan Negara is difficult to sell. When you ask for your copyright, they don’t want to give it to you.

I think it is the right time to give me the rights to all my books. What is the point of keeping the copyright for my books if people are not interested in reading them?

Is it your opinion that we do not appreciate Malaysia’s literature figures?

I believe so. I have just returned from Korea after attending an Asia Africa Literary Festival. I was there for nine days. It was wonderful to see how they loved books and writers.

There was a special segment on me on TV. I was so inspired that I have written 68 poems and will compile them into a book called Soneta Pohon Ginkgo (available in the market in April).

My poems were recently translated into Bangla and launched in Bangladesh. It appears that I am beginning to be appreciated in other countries. So I don’t worry that my country doesn’t appreciate me.

Do you think the country will ever learn to appreciate you?

When you are no longer here, then they will appreciate you. They will sing praises of you. They will say we have lost a shinning star from the sky. They will say you are so good. They will say hilang tak dapat diganti. (what is lost cannot be replaced)

You constantly criticise DBP. But they gave you your first big break. They launched you into stardom by publishing your books. Some might say you are biting the hand that feeds you.

Yes. I bite the hand if I see the hand doesn’t really give me good things (laughs). It is wrong to say DBP gives me anything.

The people give tax to the government and the government goes through DBP and then DBP gives the money to me.

It is people’s money that published my books. If I owe anything to anyone, I owe to the people who paid taxes. I don’t owe DBP. It is their mission is to see what allocation they have and give the money to the authors who they think can give back to the country. The money is not from the DBP director’s own pocket.

Some people think I might have grudges against DBP. But that is not the case.

What kind of roles do you like to see DBP play in promoting literature?

I don’t want to complain about DBP anymore. What is done is done. What I care about now is just give me back my copyright and I will be happy.

How do other Sasterawan Negara feel about the situation?

Maybe I am the only one who is not happy with what is happening. Maybe the others are happy. I should not represent them.

What do you think of your own writing and your own work?

I keep meeting people who ask me about the same book I wrote almost 50 years ago. I wrote it when I was 23. I’m going to be 73 in April and people are still taking about Salina (his first novel). It is as if they don’t know that I have written 65 books.

I have gone into short stories, novels, essays, poems and plays. But people keep coming back with the same book. Yes they know me, it doesn’t necessarily mean they read my work. I believe they read my work only when they are in school. (Salina is a school textbook) Only those who want to be writers read all my books later.

How do you know people don’t read your other books?

I know when people read my work. When I ask questions about my books, they grope in the dark.

Reading is not easy. Unless you have cultivated the habit, you will not read. Things are becoming easier with the existing graphic novels. Now they can see pictures only. The intellectual groups always complain that my books are difficult to read, my books are difficult to study.

So why don’t you make your books easy to read like popular fiction?

I am always moving up. I should not go down. They (readers) should also go up. If they don’t understand me, it doesn’t mean I am wrong. I am 72 and I have been through all sorts of experiences. I don’t just make a sentence. I care about every word I write, whether it is reasonable, whether it is beautiful.

Schools must help them come to that level. Instead they just say the books are difficult, so let us run away from them.

You could write in English. Why don’t you write in that language?

People have in the past advised me to write in English, so I will get a bigger audience. But I want to create Malay literature. When I die, I want to leave behind a khazanah Melayu (Malay heritage). You can have my work in English after you translate it. A lot of writers in the world write in their mother tongue and have their work translated into English.

Some say you see English as a colonial language and as a result dislike English and refuse to write in it.

(feigning disapproval) Yes. I dislike the English language. Yes, I don’t like it that you write in English ... You have no alternative because English is the language of the world. Most of what I have read is also in English. As I said earlier, I want to create Malay literature.

So why haven’t we translated your work as well as that of other Sasterawan Negara in English so the books can be sold in the overseas market?

You should ask this question to DBP and the National Translation Institute. That is their work. I wonder what the function of the institute is if they don’t translate work.

Do you think the media is supportive of serious Malay literature?

They are not helping. Malay newspapers do not have a specific literary editor ... I don’t know about English language newspapers. As a result, good books get ignored. Bad books get advertised and supported. Good literary events don’t get reported.

Do you think you have come to a stage where critics are afraid to criticise your work and say what you have produced is the work of a genius?

We do not have good critics. I don’t worry about that. But there are people who still say I write rubbish. There have been arguments before this on why a book like Salina, in which I write about prostitutes in Singapore, should be promoted in school. They say the topic is not suitable for students.

But in America students read To Kill A Mockingbird, which is about racial discrimination. They want to explain to students about racial discrimination.

How would you like to be remembered?

As an A. Samad Said who was always unhappy with what was happening around him.

Why this unhappiness?

I want different things. I dream of a caring society, where there is peace, where we respect each other, where we will always smile always, where we shake hands and hug each other. We don’t get that in Iraq or Pakistan or Indonesia, and we don’t get that in Afghanistan. But this is the world, This is not heaven. You get that only in heaven.

Some people believe this is zaman kejatuhan (the era of the downfall) of serious Malay literature. Do you agree?

I do not think literature has jatuh (fallen). There are still new young writers such as Faizal Tehrani and Nisah Harun who are writing serious literature. If I can fall down, they too can fall down. But I always tell them to continue to write no matter what. But there is no appreciation for what you have given them. I would say this is zaman kejatuhan penulis (the era of the downfall of writers).

Did you ever imagine that serious literature would be in the doldrums when you first started writing?

Never. When I started writing (in his 20s), I thought the writing scene would have a vibrant and marvellous future. But I was wrong. If they don’t want to read my books, what can I do? If they don’t want to read books, what can I do? They will be stupid because they don’t read.

In the current situation, how do you motivate yourself to write?

There are times when I want to give up writing altogether. But when I pray, I feel peaceful and I become inspired.

Lately, I have been painting and drawing. I held an exhibition recently and sold 20 paintings. I got more than for what I write.

Seeing the present state of serious Malay literature, do you ever wish you could turn back the clock and had never chosen to be a writer?

I would still want to be a writer, even knowing this would be the ending. I will not change the fact that I am a writer. Writing is in my blood.

What is your advice to budding writers who want to dabble in serious Malay literature?

I have no more advice for writers. They no longer need my advice. They know Malay literature will not be supported.

Segalanya adalah RASA

2009-09-09T14:44:00.000-07:00

menangis....
bukan tanda kita lemah,
ketawa...
bukan tanda kita bahagia,
risau...
bukan tanda kita buntu,
cinta..
bukan tanda kita sayang.

hati ini..
jiwa ini..
perasaan ini..
hanya anugerah yang terbaik,
kepada siapa kita harus berterima kasih?

HILANG

2009-09-08T13:06:00.001-07:00

terang jiwa ini membuat terkenang,
kisah yang silam,
pergi tanpa berpaling lagi,

hilang...
aku dan mereka,
segala galeri,
segala keseronokan.

aku cuba lagi kembali,
tp...
tak mungkin aku diterima.

tidurku kini,
menjadi penghantar kembali,
kembali ke zaman silamku.

Maksud:
puisi ini sebenarnye mengisahkan aku...
aku yang selalu tekenang zaman aku kecik dulu..aku mmg seorang yg sangat terkenangkan zaman silam...kawan2..suasana..port2 lepak...tempat tangkap ikan..tempat panjat pokok..tempat main galah panjang..yg paling penting umah aku dulu...

sedih betul bila teringat kat tempat time kecik dulu..biasa la...aku tinggal umh pindah2...bapak aku askar..kene posting je manjang...

member2 lak kebyakan nye semua lost contact...errmmm...
ade la jugak member yg lagi time kecik dulu...

aku pown x paham kenapa tempat umh aku time kecik2 dulu selalu tebawak dalam mimpi aku...
slalu lak 2...mungkin terlampau rindu sngat kowt...xpown aku ade tertinggal apa2 ke kat sana...
entah la...

tag dari noni!!!!

2009-09-07T12:30:00.000-07:00

1. How old r u?

19thn 11 bulan 7 hari

2. are u single?

insyaALLAH

3. At what age do u think u'll get married?

duit pown xde lagi..we ptptn ade la

4. Do u think u'll be marrying the person u r with now?

sape??apesal ko nk tau..bukan ko kuar wet pown..sibuk je..

5. If not, who do u want to marry?

ngan pompuan r...xkan ngan bapuk kowt...

6. Who will be ur bridesmaid or ur best man?

entah la jang

7.Do u want a garden/beach or traditional wedding?

kampung sudeh...

8. Where do u plan to go for honeymoon?

kat gambang sudeh

9.How many guest do u think u'll invite?

apa punya soalan da...mcm la ko nk bayar tiap kepala..

10. How many layers of cake do u want?

x kira lak aku...kek lapis leh kire ke??

11. When do u want to get married?morning or evening?

tengok la ikut mood time 2..

12. Name the song/tune u would like to play at ur wedding?

lagu selamat ari raya

13. Do u prefer fine dining or juz normal spoon/fork/knife?

mcm bgus je soalan nih..kerek lebih..

14. Champagne or red wine?

cadangan yang baik..nanti aku test tanya mak aku..ok??

15. Honeymoon right after wedding or days after wedding?

soalan nih mmg busybody

16. Money or household items?

duit dan harta x penting...yang penting kawin!!!!!

17. How many kids would u like to have

15 setengah...buleh ke??

18. Will u record ur honeymoon in DVD n CD?

mp3 leh x???

sepi

2009-09-06T05:09:00.000-07:00

bisikku pada bulan,
kembalikan,
temanku,
kekasihku,
surgaku,

tanpa dia malam menemaniku,
sepi memelukku,

bulan..
jangan biar siang,
biar alam ini kelam,
biar ia sepi sepertiku.

(petikan dari filem SEPI)

Datang dan pergi

2009-09-05T13:45:00.000-07:00

jikalau simpulan itu mudah,
mudahlah ia dileraikan,
seperti angin yang datang dan pergi,
tiada erti lagi jika dikenang.

datang dan pergi tanpa kata,
bukan lagi cara bagi ku,
aku hanya seperti mlm,
hanya sekadar persinggahan.

katakan pada malam,
biarkan bulan sentiasa indah,
bukan lagi sekadar diam,
biarkan ia berbicara dengan ku.

Bila aku mula merasa

2009-09-01T12:51:00.000-07:00

hidup yang kadang-kadang indah,
adakalanya sepi tanpa apa-apa,
tanpa kita sedar dan rasa,
semua akan menjadi rasa sakit.

hidup yang kadang-kadang sepi,
seperti langit yang sentiasa tenang,
tidak semudah yang kita rasai,
bukan lagi rasa seperti rasa harapan.

hidup yang kadang-kadang hilang,
hilang membawa segala rasa hati,
bila rasa ini mulai hilang,
terdiam aku mengenang rasa hati ini.

......Pendam.......

2009-08-20T11:56:00.000-07:00

Memang aku dan semua orng x dpt lari dari perubahan...
aku akur dgn semua tu...
aku bukan lagi budak kecik yg perlu dibentuk..
kini aku dapat pikir sendiri mana yg baik dan mana yg buruk..

Jiwa aku kini semakin tidak tenang...
semua perjalan yg aku lalui mungkin kurang tepat...
aku semakin berfikir dan terus berfikir...
aku lebih senang berdiam diri...

bukan kerana aku takut atau malu...
tapi ingin berfikir dengan lebih mendalam...
kenapa aku jadi begini?
siapa yg menetukan hidup aku?

jiwa yg tenang bergantung sejauh mana keikhlasan aku...
keikhlasan dalam apa jua yg aku lakukan...
bukan lagi kerana duit, nama semata...

semakin jauh aku pergi semakin jauh pemikiran aku...
aku semakin mengerti apa yg aku cari...
yg selama ini mungkin aku tidak sedar...
syukur aku kerana hidup aku ditentukan begini...

aku bukan seorang yg kosong tanpa apa-apa...
jiwa aku semakin berisi dengan nyawa jiwa yg sebenar...
jiwa yg ingin memberontak kini aku dapat mengawalnya...
sehingga aku sedar ini adalah ketentuan ALLAH...
alhamdulillah....

sape pulak aku nih??

2009-08-17T13:51:00.000-07:00

HAhahahaha....
ape punya tajuk lak aku wat nih...
tp mmg pown aku nk kongsi kat korang sape plak aku nih....
ermmmm....

Aku rasa mmg sape2 kawan ngan aku xtau yg aku nih sebenarnye suka bersendiri...
bukannye aku x suka berkawan sape2..jgn salah anggap ek...
aku lebih suka cakap dalam hati....sebab aku rasa lebih tenang....seronoknye!!!!
ke korang same cm 2 gak??
hahaha

aku suke menulis
aku suka tulis puisi2....
aku kagum ngan lagu2 yg p.ramlee tulis...pehhh!!!dasyat...indah ayat2 die...
aku bukan jiwang beb!!!beragak skit...

dalam diam aku, dlm suka suki aku...aku masih waras lagi...aku ada impian aku, ada cita2 aku sejak dari skolah...
insyaALLAh xkan berubah...keadaan yg mampu merubah impian dan harapan aku...
dengan izin ALLAH....

aku mmg perasan..aku mmg sedar diri aku lebih cenderung kearah seni....
aku mmg suka berkarya...tp sampai skng aku xde karya apa lagi...
aku x suke wat karya yg bodoh2...berangan je lebih..usaha x nak nak!!!
mungkin juga keadaan sekeliling yg jadik aku x dapat meluaskan atau mengilap apa yg aku ada...
mungkin la kowt....

aku paling benci habit aku yg ini!!!!!
aku seorng yg careless....
careless yg mcm mana 2 kita xtau....
mcm2 la....
buat test ke, buat keje ape2 ke...
mangkuk tul!!!!

aku suke berkawan??
yeke???
mmg pown...kawan buat aku ilang boring...
hahaha...
kawan,kawan dan terus berkawan...
errrmmm....
bia aku byk cabel...hahaha....
sekarang je aku ade 1514 kawan (hahaha...aku main hentam je...mana nk ingat dowh)

banyak la pulak nk kene taip...
itu je kowt setakat nih..
dah r 2...
hahaha...

sepi si malam hari....

2009-08-10T09:44:00.000-07:00

Sekiranya sepi itu kembali,
aku tidak mampu lagi berpaling,
andai tiada lagi hari,
malam yang dingin inginku kembali.

menumpahkan ilham hanya pada malam,
sinarnya tiada oleh bintang,
andainya sepi kian mendalam,
mana mungkin aku menghilang.

siapa sangka yang kelam itu hitam,
takku sangka yang hitam itu cahaya,
cahaya kesepian itu dalam,
hampir sepi di kala riang.